Soft leadership is tapping
into your humane side and see
that reflection in the people
In this interview we talk to Daisy Lynch, founder of Ziora. Daisy was recently diagnosed with 'epilepsy'. A diagnosis that will undoubtedly be marked in your life as 'LifeQuake', a moment that changes your life. I'm going to talk to her to hear how she views this sudden change and how Daisy looks forward to the future. - Monique-
How has the recently made diagnosis impacted you as a person, entrepreneur and your business?
I didn't see it coming at all and was also shocked when I heard the diagnosis. We all know epilepsy as the cliché image of someone who falls down shaking, but for me that was not the case at all. Epilepsy is a condition that is highly underestimated in this society. One moment you're full of energy making plans as an entrepreneur and the next moment your body stops working. It no longer functioned the way it used to. A bitter pill to swallow if you are used to working with a lot of passion. All the plans you had suddenly fade away and your health & rest immediately takes top priority, so the impact was quite large.
What was it like for you to hear that diagnosis and how do you deal with it in your daily life and as an entrepreneur?
Once the diagnosis was made, it was actually quite liberating. It took several months before they knew for sure that this was epilepsy. The chronic disease manifests itself in very differently ways, so it was not easy for doctors to be sure about this diagnosis. It wasn't until I had my first real serious attack and was taken to the hospital by ambulance that they knew for sure. In the months before I got the diagnosis, I constantly felt that something 'bad' was going on, but without knowing what is wrong with you there are so many questions and fears popping up. Once the solution was found and I finally got the help I needed it was very liberating for me. I'm lucky enough to be surrounded by a strong group of people who support and help me in any way they can. That makes me a very lucky woman.
How can someone like you, who has such a positive attitude towards life, keep her mindset positive, despite the impact on your health & business? How did you do it?
I am grateful for the help I have received from the doctors, nurses and neurologist as well for the people around me who embrace me with so much love. Having a close circle of friends who love you makes a real difference. But I definitly had times when this challenge was very scary and difficult. To think positive in moments like that it requires a lot of willpower and energy. But I am convinced that being positive in the long term helps you more in so many ways than giving your attention to negative thoughts. 'You might be given a cactus, but you don't have to sit on it.' This is such an inspiring quote. Thinking negatively or asking yourself why this is happening and continuing to wander in pain just makes your life that much harder. It's not an easy challenge so negativity would only make such a period even heavier. This does not alter the fact that you can of course express your concerns and doubts. If you're having a hard time don't fake being ok and talk to the right people. But keep your core intention positive.
Is positive thinking healing for you?
Positive thinking is definitely healing... I also believe that it benefits your recovery. I therefore never speak of 'illness' but of 'recovery'. Your subconscious mind is listening and I want my body to absorb the right things. Affirmations are very important to me. This has been scientifically proven to have a positive and restorative effect on body & mind. I then develop affirmations about the life I want to have after the recovery and I do not engage in positive affirmations about the recovery itself. To me that feels like accepting and letting go of what you are going through.
How and what options do you have to increase your recovery? Which paths have you taken or do you still want to take to increase your quality of life?
I am a big ambassador of healthy food. Healing through plants and herbs as well as the well-founded forms of alternative medicine can really make a difference too. But sometimes we need science and western medicine to help the body recover. For me, the key is to find balance in both worlds. There are many situations in which you can go a long way by giving the body the necessary rest, something we don't recognize and incorporate enough in this 'fast-paced' society. The body has the power to heal itself if you give it the opportunity to do so in the right circumstances. But there are also several diseases that need help from western medication. Yet I don't believe that you can take medication and continue to live your life as you did before. Illness has something to tell you and medication can be supportive, but you also have to make the effort to work on your health. Taking medication for cholesterol, by example, and continuing to eat unhealthy does not seem logical to me. I, myself, combine medication with the work of 'Joe Dispenza', healthy food, drinking plenty of water, taking enough rest and being selective in the things you allow into your life. I too have made changes.
A NEW START
What changes in your life have you made since then? Which ones have you already implemented and what effect did this have on your life and the people around you?
We are not always aware of it, but we receive a lot of stimuli around us throughout the day. In today's society we even get an overdose of stimuli that can be too much for the human brain. We live in a fast paced society that expects you to be available 24 hours a day. This is a recognizable situation for many people, when we look at social media, the many messages & e-mails that pop up, the pressure to be on time, picking up your children from school... It's a lot for the human mind to handle. Most people can probably even add a lot more to this list....
Some of those stimuli are not even positive and as I mentioned before our subconscious absorbs this. There are a lot of contacts on social media or friends around you who do not contribute to our happiness. During my recovery I became aware of how many negative stimuli I unconsciously absorbed which had an effect on my mental health. A few days ago I saw a woman post a picture of herself on Facebook with an angry face and the message that her daughter had borrowed something of her and misplaced it. At that time, I was so amazed that I subconsciously absorbed this. It's not something I would like to pass on to other people. It does not contribute to a qualitative message that you want to share with your followers. Something I didn't realize before so for me this was the start of a new life. I'm very aware that what and who I allow in my life contributes to my physical and mental health.
How do you act on this? And who or what contributes to your vision of life?
When we talk about social media, you have the choice what to see on your daily feed. Every page or person that doesn't contribute to a healthy input isn't worth your time & energy. This doesn't mean you should fall in the trap of being 'too positive' because that can also be harmful, feeling our emotions is very important. Sometimes we just need to honestly say how we feel and if you don't feel good then you should be able to say it as long as you don't get stuck in a spiral of self-pity. My Social Media feed is now full of images and people that inspire me and make me happy. I also like to support these people and pages on their path regardless of any bumps in the road or challenges they face. In addition, I do not remove the other type of people from my account but I only hide them on my feed because I hope to inspire these people with positive messages.
You mention social media here, but how does this work in your daily life and contacts you meet face to face? How do you monitor your healthy positive mindset in this?
In the past I was too much focused on people who take a lot of energy from me. I was often 'the savior' who was there for everyone when they needed it. As a result, I gave a lot of people more chances than they deserved. When you're suddenly faced with a challenge that leaves you with no energy left to give, a lot of these people don't play a supporting role in your life. From there on I started letting go of everything. This was the turning point that I needed. I started to let go of the friends and contacts that didn't support my new way of living. Of course we cannot expect and demand that people are there for us everytime we need them. Everyone has their own path and sometimes things are not going well for them either. But common sense prevails here.
LEARN TO ACCEPT
So you're now surrounding yourself with people you can rely on, as you indicate yourself. How do you currently experience this?
There were a lot of people who sent me so much love and support. I was blown away by the amount of love that I received from people I did not even expect it from. People I didn't know before suddenly became very close friends. And I allowed that to happen for myself during my recovery. I have learned to receive love & help which is a giant step when you are used to giving to others for years. It was very uncomfortable at first because this doesn't feel normal, but once I allowed it, it was so enriching and healing for me. I really enjoyed the many pleasant conversations and the friendships that have developed. It makes a huge difference for me and my mental health because this is the form of self-care I needed in my life. I would not have realized this I had not experienced this illness. Every negative experience in your life contributes to a positive change. The great thing about learning to receive is that this really recharges your batteries, so you have more energy to give back as well. For example, I now feel that I pay more attention to the people on the street or at the counter/checkout,.. I show appreciation for their work and consciously give compliments. You see that they really appreciate this and because of this we both leave with a happy feeling. You spread your positive energy mainly because of who you are.
How wonderful to hear that the circle of giving and receiving is complete. Are there any lessons you've learned during your recovery period that you would like to pass on to others? Or that you still want to learn?
Taking care of your body has been a very important lesson for me. Anyone who knows my story knows that I also had a period in the past where illness had a major impact. If you don't know this story, I invite you to surf to www.daisylynch.com where this story was told. That period made me realize how important a healthy diet, a good night's sleep and exercise is. But I still demanded a lot from my body. Through those years of struggle I had the feeling that I had lost so much precious time. Time that I wanted to make up for. I worked long hours and I wanted to complete 5 tasks at once. The more I could do in a day, the better. And this is very demanding on your body. You always think that you can handle it or will feel it until it comes to a point where your body really says 'stop'.
YOUR BODY TALKS TO YOU
When you are born you receive a body which is actually a very beautiful gift... the gift of 'life'. It is therefore your job to take good care of this body and to learn to listen to it when it is talking to you. That fatigue or headache has something to tell you. And often you know what that is, so you should act on it. Humans bodies can be very strong because we can last quite a long time on our extra battery. That's nice, but life is even nicer if you can live with a balance between 'working with passion' and taking enough rest. The body needs you to take good care of it and you need your body to live the life you want. You are a team. Seeing the body as your best friend is a big change in life. I am now even more grateful than before.
So gratitude is something that takes more space in your life now? And how does this manifest itself for you?
I have always been grateful for the things I have around me. I am very aware that the small things in life can be very big for others. Having a home is something that everyone sees as something normal to have, but there are quite a lot of people who do not live in these circumstances. Even as a child I was naturally very grateful for what I had, but this period has added extra strength to that.
Finally Daisy, with your new perspective towards a healthy balance between life and business, how do you see your future? What do you want to say to your followers?
Slow down! That is the key word for me as an entrepreneur. Many people who have a great passion for their job work with such dedication that they often lose sight of themselves. I am now more convinced than ever that you can do the same amount of work by working more slowly. When you take more time for moments of rest, you see all that needs to be done from a distance. This provides new insights that you might not have when you are so busy-busy. These insights can even help you move forward faster. Calmness and tranquility are therefore necessary because they increase your chances of success as an entrepreneur. In addition, not only the moments of rest are important, but also the way in which you go through life. How many times have we not been hunted by our minds and bodies? How often are we busy with a task while our body is feeling very tense? Possibly with 5 other things in mind that we need to do? In my future I see myself working 'gently & lovingly' and I will take my time to finish a task in a calm manner. That calmness helps enormously if you want to work qualitatively and maintain a healthy mental & physical health at the same time. I wish the same to all my members and followers!
Thank you for your openness and good luck with your recovery!!!
Monique has experience with overstimulation and burnout, so she hopes to inspire as many people as possible to start living differently. It is her passion to ignite a 'spark' in others that ensures that they live more qualitatively and take their own mental/physical health into their own hands. This interview is therefore intended to give people a realistic view of life during a recovery and what you can control.